Mastering Life, Creating Healthy Relationships at Home and at Work

Mastering Life and Creating Healthy Relationships Between Couples, With Family and at Work

bigstock Success 36381031 300x226 Mastering Life, Creating Healthy Relationships at Home and at WorkThere is an ancient and universal roadmap and set of practices to achieve a high quality of life both at work and at home. These practices have many different names and for this discussion we will call them The Masteries of Life or simply The Masteries. This is about practical practices which will allow anyone to create real, positive change both at work and at home. CTypes can be at the center of these practices. Too much stress? Unhealthy or problematic relationships? Lack of money? Bad bosses? Unhealthy body? Unhappy? Every single “problem” in life is created in the mind before it manifests in the outside world. As we heal our minds, we heal our world. Practiced properly, CTypes is a “can’t miss” strategy that pulls the right relationships to us, heals existing relationships and solves life problems. CTypes also offer a personal, professional and spiritual growth strategy that is simple and effective.

Dibbleism: The mind creates each individual’s reality from the inside out. To change our reality, we must first change our mind.

Dibbleism: For most individuals, the mind runs unattended and we are dragged through life without any inputs into the quality (or lack of quality) of our lives.

Dibbleism: To gain control over our lives, we must first gain control of our minds.

The Power of the Mind and Mastering Life in Relationships With Self and Others

How can we manage, expand and control our minds so that we have some influence over what we experience in our lives? This is where the universal principles of the Masteries of Life come into play. Becoming a master of the mind requires discipline and commitment. Discipline and commitment to what? We must learn to live the Masteries in one form or another. It is the Masteries that optimize and focus the power of CTypes to change your life.

The Masteries

Three areas of life must be mastered to take charge of our lives: Awareness, Change, and Life. When we become masters of Awareness and Change we are naturally led to being a master of life wherein we can create the life we desire, at work and home.

Note: Everything starts with Awareness. In my own journey to a more enlightened experience of life, I formally worked on the Mastery of Awareness for more than four years. The work still goes on today, 20 years later. But over the years, the practice has become a labor of love. I can no longer contemplate life without a high degree of awareness…because “life” IS awareness and consciousness. You can do this too. Anyone can. Let’s meet the Masteries.

The Mastery of Awareness

Your mind is made up of thoughts, beliefs and memories that manifest as that critical voice in your head that constantly comments on everything you say, do or perceive. When the voice is negative, you’re listening to your judgmental mind. It’s that little voice in your head that may be saying, “What little voice?” or “How am I going to pay the rent?” For practical purposes, we’ll define the mind as what you think and the emotional energy that accompanies every thought.

Awareness requires waking up to the fact that the real you is not your mind. It means knowing at the deepest level of your intuitive self that you are much more than what you think or the emotions that give value to each thought. It is essential to develop awareness because without awareness change and transformation is not possible. Without it, your mind simply runs on automatic pilot and you receive what unconscious thinking dishes out for you. However, once you’ve developed a heightened sense of awareness, your mind becomes your friend and collaborator in creating a quality life.

Achieving the Mastery of Awareness requires the following three simple steps: (1) catch yourself in the moment; (2) observe what’s going on—inside and out; and (3) make a choice.

Step 1: Catch Yourself in the Moment

Let me explain these three steps of achieving Mastery of Awareness by giving an example. Let’s say you typically behave impatiently when stuck in traffic. You don’t like how you feel you want to change your usual reaction. First, try catching yourself at the very moment you start feeling frustrated or behaving impatiently. Most people are great at catching themselves after the fact, but looking back is an almost meaningless activity. Instead, catch yourself in the moment. It’s the same for CType. You have to have some awareness in the moment when you are doing too much of your natural CType.

Dibbleism: Power is only in the moment because life is lived only in the moment. There is no power in past or future because they do not exist.

As typical human beings with little awareness, it is unlikely to think to yourself, I think I’ll be really frustrated because I’m stuck in traffic. With little awareness, we are also unlikely to think to ourselves in real time, The reason I’m having this problem in my relationship is because I’m doing too much of my natural CType. You just automatically feel frustrated when circumstances prompt that type of reaction in you. The mind is running the show and you are dragged along for the emotional ride. This is the action-reaction cycle that most of us experience as normal. On the other hand, if you become consciously aware of your thoughts and feelings in the moment when you are experiencing them, you can become the observer. By so doing, you gain a powerful advantage and the opportunity to take charge and change the thoughts that are making you feel angry or frustrated.

Step 2: Observe What’s Going On—Inside and Out

After heightening your awareness of what you are thinking, you can move to the next step of proactive change: observing your thoughts and emotions. With this new awareness, you might think to yourself, Oh, there are those feelings of frustration again . . . the ones I get when I’m stuck in traffic. This is a great opportunity to watch the situation and my reaction to it. If there is a lack of communication in your relationship, you would observe that the cause of this lack of communication is you and your partner doing too much of your natural CTypes.

In the physical universe, the very act of observing something changes it. The science of quantum physics discovered that two researchers cannot view the same event and see the same thing. That which is being observed is altered by the consciousness of those who perceive it. The act of observing the mind begins to change the mind. This phenomenon presents a useful prospect for creating proactive change whether stuck in traffic or healing a relationship and lead us to Step 3–making a choice.

Step 3: Make a Choice

As you develop more and more awareness of your thoughts  that activate the behavior or experience you want to change—and can consciously observe them—you reach a most powerful place: the place of choice. Here you can choose to be frustrated or not. You can choose to stay in your natural CType or move toward your opposite. If you choose to be frustrated, great! Go all out! Roll your eyes, stomp your foot, throw your hands in the air in exasperation at the traffic congestion. Whatever you do when you get frustrated, do it now and do more of it. Get really worked up! You might be pleasantly surprised to discover what happens by exaggerating the thing you’re trying to change. Many times you’ll begin to see your frustrated routine for what it is and that will take the emotional charge out of it. You might even laugh spontaneously as you see the humor in it.

You can do the same thing with CType. Doing too much of your natural has caused your relationship problems. You could now chose to do even more of your natural CType. Likely, the same experience will unfold for you in doing more of your natural as unfolds when you chose to do more of your frustrated in  traffic act. Because you have consciously made the choice to go deeper into the problem behavior, the negative energy begins to transform to something more positive–and useful.

The simple act and process of becoming aware, observing your thoughts, and your accompanying feelings creates the option of choosing your actions. The more times you observe the thoughts and emotions that normally cause the unwanted reactions, the more times you can choose your actions. And the more times you choose your actions, the faster you will change.

Dibbleism: Negative emotions should be the main Mastery/CType Practice Trigger that alerts you to the need to pull yourself into conscious awareness and begin the practice of the Masteries.

Emotions—particularly fear-based ones—are signals that it is time to bring yourself to a heightened state of awareness. Whenever you become aware of a strong, negative emotion, catch yourself in real-time, observe your thinking and emotional reaction, and choose how you want to respond.

You—not your mind—must make conscious choices. Yet there is no right or wrong choice. If you’re angry, you can choose to identify with that emotion (I’m angry) or stop it. We must remember that choosing to change or choosing not to change is still a step in the right direction. As you will see, the choice itself is not as important as the process you took to make that choice.

The Mastery of Change

After you become aware of the thoughts that caused you to feel frustrated, the next step is choosing different thoughts and letting go of the fear-based ones you want to change. This process is the basis of the Mastery of Change. When you become aware of frustrating, energy-draining thoughts, you can choose new ones based in love rather than fear. Fear or love: that’s always the choice.

Let’s go back to our “stuck in traffic” frustration and look at a new set of thoughts that might better serve you. You could choose to change your thoughts from ones of anger and frustration to something more like this:

No one is intentionally trying to make me angry by clogging the roadway. Nothing I do is going to get me home any faster. This may actually be a blessing. Maybe the delay and slow speed will prevent me from getting in an accident on the way home. I can put on my meditation music and repeat my Thank you–Thank you–Thank you mantra. Besides, this is a wonderful time to practice the Masteries of Awareness and Change. Actually, this whole experience is a gift. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you (David’s Relationship Mantra).

By choosing more loving thoughts, you’re choosing less frustration. It’s the same for CType. When you choose to move toward your opposite, you are choosing to grow and take appropriate relationship building action. As you choose thoughts more based in love, you’ll proactively change, transforming yourself into a new, more authentic person. It does take effort and commitment on your part. Status quo or a new you—it’s your choice.

The Mastery of Life

The third mastery is the Mastery of Life. It might also called the mastery of love, light, or energy. Quantum physics proves that everything in the universe and on Earth is made of energy. Objects once thought of as solid can be broken down into molecules, which are made up of atoms and subatomic particles, which are nothing more than expressions of energy. In other words, nothing is solid; it is just energy in its many different forms.

By mastering life, you align yourself with the natural flow of the universe and the Higher Mind. When your mind is full of thoughts, beliefs, and memories based in love, your mind aligns with the creative power that makes the stars shine.

You can send your life energy—love—anywhere in the world at any time. You can send it through a thought, meditation, or a prayer. You can send it through your eyes, your hands, a word, a touch. If you stopped reading these words right now and sent your love to someone you didn’t even know—maybe someone who is ill in a hospital in another country—that person might heal more quickly. Prayer, meditation, caring, good thoughts, and compassion have all been linked directly to an increase in healing. And it’s not only physical healing. It’s emotional healing–healing of the relationships with self and others that manifest through the Mastery of Life. Meditation has changed physical reality by reducing crime and casualties in war.  It is life (loving energy) that creates change in physical reality.

The Masteries of Awareness, Change, and Life are not a destination. They are a never-ending life process that must be practiced, reinforced, and supported on a regular basis—at best, every day.  Everything starts with Awareness of the mind in real time and then progresses to the Mastery of Change and, with commitment and practice, the Mastery of Life. Practice these Masteries to become a master of moving to your opposite CType. As you master the essential move to your opposite CType, you will become a model and teacher for others who are ready grow personally, professionally and spiritually.

Thank you for reading my words. Thank you, thank you, thank you (David’s Relationship  Mantra).

With conscious admiration and respect…